Sunday, August 14, 2011


Imagine an endless sea of choppy, dark-grey water. You can't tell how deep the water is, but it could go down for miles and miles. Above you is a heavily overcast sky. There's no blue, just storms in varying degrees of formation.

There's only one other thing visible anywhere. Stretching on as far as you can see is an iron girder, maybe a foot wide, with water lapping over it. Above this is the smallest of openings in the cloud. A thin streak of watery sunlight shines down on the girder.

Think how little a bump it would take to send you off the girder and into the sea to drown.

I came off my meds a couple of months ago. Welcome to my world.


At 9:36 pm, Blogger Shawna said...

All I can offer is big *hugs*. I remember you telling me why you came off your meds. I hope that safe alternatives can be found for the interim. The only natural remedy I've heard of is vitamin D. Not sure what else helps depression. I know that phone calls are expensive, but I'm up late, so if you need to call or chat or anything, just let me know. Dave, too. We'll be thinking of you. *hugs*

Oh, verification word: mistr. :)

At 1:47 pm, Blogger Nettie said...

I've found that what helps me when I don't want to be on meds is a bit of pampering and looking after myself. I know it's clich├ęd but getting some exercise and eating well really does make you feel better. Also, ask Chris one night to take Zeph while you have a bath and give yourself a facial.
I know the hardest part about depression is actually finding the effort and drive to take those small steps, but if you can do it, they might help bring a little colour back into your world.

Hang in their hun, it'll be worth it in the end. I'm always here if you need me.

At 8:18 pm, Anonymous DavePrime said...

Ah, luv. *hugs*

That darkness that threatens to envelope you and freeze your soul is sometimes SO F***ing hard to face.

But you have friends both near and far just waiting to mirror a bit of warming light from over the horizon!

Today is a hard day. So was yesterday. But tomorrow a bit more sun may just shine through in a smile, a glance, or a piece of music you haven't heard in a long time.

Don't give up!

At 2:31 am, Blogger Acci said...

You at least have people there to help catch you if you fall off the girder, or to try to fish your soggy self out of the water after you splash into it.


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